England and Wales company registration number 2008885. A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! The teacher is now angry. Arsenal has been in the Champions League for 18 years straight and hasnt won it, what are they gonna miss?The anthem. Hate Jokes Arsenal You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and an Arsenal Fan. 40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule, 80 Football World Cup 2022 Jokes To Cheer Soccer Fans, 50 Funny Arsenal Jokes You Shouldnt Tell A Gunner. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. "Why do I need help?" What does a Spurs fan do after he sees his team win a trophy?Turns off the Xbox. And they only scored at the very very end, said the teammates.Maradonna says, No, No, I have, Ive let you down! A: Because they never have any points. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); One day while driving along, he saw a priest. Godspeed. Watch Champions League Live Tottenham fan kicks Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale in back after drama-filled end to Premier League clash It took place behind the Gunners' goal when Ramsdale. A: The accused. Knock, knock. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. 'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while! What have Arsenal FC and demonstrators got in common?They get beaten regularly. "No way Richard," says his mate "of course we'll still be pals!! Im looking for a rubbish tip.The other man said, Arsenal to win the Premier League., A woman was reading a newspaper one morning when she mentioned a piece of news to her husband.Take a look at this, dear. "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", A: arsenel. What is Tottenhams new trophy room name?The Room. Q: Why are Arsenal jokes getting dumb and dumber? I know it's bad, but everyone deserves a good arsenal of dad jokes. Get insight to top players, instructions & drills and extensive coverage of equipment. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. A: I cry when I cut up onions The picture looked completely different a couple of weeks ago with Mikel Arteta's side sitting above Spurs in the Premier League table ahead of the North London . A: The bucket. Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito?A mosquito stops sucking. It only receives one station! A: Nice tattoo Theres an article here about a man who traded his wife for an Arsenal season ticket. You all know its familiar contours: fail to challenge for the title, cling on for a Champions League place, finish second in the group stage in the following season and then get knocked out at the last-16. The Spurs fan put his cap over one breast, the Watford fan put his cap over the other, and the Gooner put his cap "down below". "Let's hear the good news," the president replied. Whats the difference between Liz Truss and Tottenham Hotspur?Liz Truss has no sons. Share the funny puns and roasts in the comment section below. Q: What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur fan in a suit? Maybe I'm NOT the world's smallest man". A: The bucket. There's an article here about a man who traded his wife for a season ticket to Arsenal. Have you all heard about the new Arsenal Bra?It has a whole lot of support but it doesnt have any cups. About every ten years a small team wins the EPL.86 Forest95 Blackburn04 Arsenal16 Leicester. We are nothing without our fans and this section is dedicated to our loyal supporters across the globe. Have a funny joke on Arsenal? Two days on and it still doesn't seem real: the dreamlike final weekend of the season, which in its sweeping drama proved once again that Tottenham will manage to unearth increasingly amazing ways, performing bizarre acts of contortion, to finish below Arsenal in the Premier League table. This site uses cookies to personalize ads and to analyse web traffic, for more info please review our Privacy Policy. When will Manchester United win the Premier League again? Santa: What do you want for Christmas?Arsenal fan: I want a dragon.Santa: Come on. A: A mosquito stops sucking. 40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule, 80 Football World Cup 2022 Jokes To Cheer Soccer Fans, 35 Tottenham Jokes You Cannot Share With Spurs Fans. The former Sky Sports presenter has long had a bee in his bonnet about the Arsenal manager being outside of his technical area for long periods of matches. A: The accused. Q: Why do Arsenal fans suck at geometry? What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. A young team lost their hope and then lost their heads and focus completely. Theres nothing to worry about, lad, said the elderly chap standing next to himIts like the bombs during the war. Why did Jos Mourinho got sacked by Spurs?He aint that special. (Gunner who? After Tom Thumb's conference, he came out smiling and said, "It's all right, I am the world's smallest man". I hope you have enjoyed reading all of these Arsenal jokes as much as I have :DPlease feel free to read more about Arsenal FC from the links below Would you prefer to share this page with others by linking to it? if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); There is, however, one exception. Why are Bayern fans sad?No Arsenal again in UCL this season. He takes another one and jumps.The third passenger was Mikel Arteta: I am the Manager of Arsenal FC and I am one of the most creative, most intelligent, and well-remembered football players. Go to Arsenal's store (opens in new tab). While in Heaven's waiting room, they were all entitled to a private conference with God, who would answer for them one question. The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. 'Of course I wouldn't!' A: They're both empty from the neck up. What is so strange about The Gunners defeat to Man Utd?They had Jesus, Mohamed, and Ram in their team and still lost to the devils. A: Nice tattoo A: Shoot the Tottenham Fan. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Liverpool supporters, and I'm a Liverpool fan, too!" Why are Tottenham jokes getting dumber by the day?Because the fans started to make them up themselves. It said it was to weak. A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! Lucy Pinder, Chris Packham and David Frost all make the cut of famous Saints fans (some more famous than others), but probably the most famous must go to Craig David. The football results are coming up on the television in the corner, Sporting CP 2, Tottenham Hotspur 0, reads the announcer in his normal, rather sedate, voice.Suddenly the Jack Russell dog jumps up and shouts out, Oh, no, not again.The shocked pub owner says, Thats amazing. I love it, this from the official website. Shall I call your wife for you?" Ill sacrifice my life for yours.But the girl replied, No need for that, there are 2 parachutes left.How is that possible? asked Pope.The girl replied, That Arsenal FC Manager took my school bag.. Why cant Tottenham open up a restaurant?Because they have no silverware. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh. After they crawl out of their cars, the Spurs fan says. Surely God wants us to drink this and celebrate our good fortune.". Do you have any questions or comments? She asks Mary why she is a Liverpool supporter. The general shifted in his seat and looked down at the table. Perhaps there is someone more beautiful than me!" Q: How do you casterate a Gunners supporter? A. What trophy will Arsenal win this season?August invincibles. ", The reporter starts again: "QPR fan saves friend from horrific attack. You have a gun with two bullets. A: Shoot the Arsenal Fan. Or why not treat yourself? ", Another messaged: "This is such a good marketing technique to get more clicks on their website. "I've good news and bad news for you this morning, sir." Away from the Premier League action, Cristiano Ronaldo was filmed angrily reacting to a young fan's Lionel Messi joke after an Al-Nassr game. The receptionist replies He takes off his clothes for other men, and if they pay him enough money, he goes into the alley and performs sexual acts on them.' ""The cups man! "Yes" replies Lukas "you should have my details on your computer". For other inquiries, Contact Us. A: So Tottenham supporters can get laid too. "I'd like to donate some sperm" he says to the receptionist. For example [my story] would show as my story on the Web page containing your story.TIP: Since most people scan Web pages, include your best thoughts in your first paragraph. Would Any Arsenal Supporter Wear A Tottenham Shirt For Money? ''Did you visit the Wailing Wall? and they also made jokes . Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? It was almost as though football was exercising its yin and yang, using divine intervention to restore balance in the universe by ensuring that Arsenal's primacy was to be protected. "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." A man is sitting in a pub with his Jack Russell dog on Tuesday night. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. Twice. There was a problem. As a result of the followers began to make them up themselves. What is the difference between Bill Clinton and Spurs strikers?Clinton can score. Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, symbol, blackandwhite, pix, etc. It sure is hard to be an Arsenal supporter. Tottenham, however, have had the recent bragging rights over their north London neighbours. "A Pedophile?" The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. Q: What do you call 5 Arsenal fans standing ear to ear? "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". Three aged soccer fans enter a church. The jibe is common between the two sets of fans. This site is an open community for users to share their favorite pics on the internet, all images or pictures in this website are for personal pix use only, it is stricly prohibited to use this images for commercial purposes, if you are the writer and find this images is shared without your permission, please kindly raise a DMCA report to Us. Why did Antonio Conte buy his team all lighters?Because they kept losing all their matches. AN Arsenal fan has trolled Tottenham by wearing a Gunners shirt in the home end during the North London derby. Diego Maradona decides to come out of retirement and play for West Ham.He goes into the changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum. ", Meanwhile one simply stated: "Quality from the Arsenal website.". He then walked away from the body. Then there was this kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. Tottenham are simply incapable of finishing above their rivals; the football gods will not allow it. What do Arsenal and Tottenham fans have in common? The car radio automatically switches to a Rolling Stones tune. And she got very depressed. You wouldn't do a thing like that,-would you?' Piers Morgan joked Arsenal don't need Mykhailo Mudryk as he watched his beloved side beat Tottenham. A. "Why do I need help?" Q: What do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet? He would swerve his van as if to hit them, then swerve back just missing them. A gummy bear. Lukas Podolski walks into a sperm donor bank in London We Have got 7 picture about Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans images, photos, pictures, backgrounds, and more. Do that, and Arsenal fans won't even have to rely on Tottenham's annual failings to put a smile on their faces. The Arsenal fan replied," I agree with you completely; this must be a sign from God! "So you're an Arsenal fan, that's interesting. "That's excellent! Did you hear about the ref who was flashed by a soccer team?He saw arsenal. What should you do? ", Feeling the need to point out their trophies won, this fan messaged: "Last time I checked, 3 European Trophies, 2 League Titles, 8 FA Cups, 4 League Cups.". It is not the first time that an Arsenal fan has gotten away with it too, with another supporter also going viral for doing similar in the away game against Chelsea. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? The incident came after Premier League leaders Arsenal put on a masterclass to overwhelm Tottenham and extend the gap at the top to eight points. Arsenal's crown in 2004. What do you say to a Spurs fan with a good-looking bird on his arm?Nice tattoo. The jibe is common between the two sets of fans. Just type!Your story will appear on a Web page exactly the way you enter it here. Do you have some pictures or graphics to add? A booming voice welcomes them as they stroll via the doorways. To inquire about a licence to reproduce material, visit our Syndication site. Q: What is the difference between an Arsenal supporter and a baby? Ive let you down Ive let you down.Dont be stupid Diego, you got a draw against Spurs all by yourself. A: Because they never have any points. A: Because the cup's always in Manchester! They come across a dead camel and are having trouble deciding who gets what? All the while, a newspaper reporter who was taking a stroll through the park is watching. Quasimodo came out of his conference scratching his head. A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. Q: What's the difference between a fat chick and an Arsenal striker? A pause, and a smile. Select it and click on the button to choose it. Again she speaks to the car radio"Country Music". Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. It reads: "Your basket is as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet.". Were totally in their heads rent free. Martin Odegaard's long range shot nine minutes before halftime pretty much ended the match as a contest, even if Spurs did improve in the second half. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sitting with his head in his hands. Q: How do you stop a Spurs supporter from beating his wife? Jessica Amlee Then Snow White says, "How do I know I'm the most beautiful woman in the world? "He couldn't go to certain places for dinner or walk freely in London because of the anger of the Tottenham fans. Youd never do something like that, would you?Of course not! exclaimed her husband. Click the button and find the first one on your computer. Both cars (with football stickers on windows) are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. by Three Men A plane with 5 passengers was about to crash mid-air and there were only 4 parachutes.The first passenger is Cristiano Ronaldo: Im the worlds best footballer, and my fans still need me. Had a player called David Dicks. A Primary school teacher explains to her class that she is a Tottenham Hotspur supporter. Whats the difference between The Emirates and a cactus?With the cactus, the pricks are on the outside. They called the police and then, for decency, decided to cover her up. "I gave them some back and the few people I did do it to was probably well-greeted, sportsmanship-like. Here is an unforgettable collection of Arsenal jokes and banter, from their Champions League run to the mocking from nearby clubs like Liverpool and Tottenham. Well it does now. Why did Super League invite Arsenal?Because someone has to finish bottom of the group and be okay with it. "Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?". "Great idea" says the second cat "I support Hartlepool. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. A: A good start! SOL CAMPBELL has slammed Tottenham fans for the years of abuse aimed at him following his move to Arsenal.The Englishman made the move to Arsenal afte . Arsenal goalkeeper, Aaron Ramsdale, has explained why a Tottenham Hotspur fan attacked him following his side's Premier League North London derby 2-0 win over Spurs on Sunday. Whats so special about Spurs from all other EPL clubs?They are a social experiment set up to see how far they can mentally and physically push a human being. I'm a Spurs fan Wow! I will eat the heart "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron, What would you be then?" An Arsenal fan has gone viral, after following in the footsteps of his fellow fan, by hiding in the home end during the north London derby. Emmanuel Adebayor walks into a sperm donor bank in London The Arsenal supporter prays to God, When will Arsenal win the Premier League again? , to which God replies, In 20 years. The admirer, like the first, is visibly upset, saying, Thats a shame, Ill probably be dead by then.God then turns his attention to the last man, asking, And what of you, my son? What exactly is your question? not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. You wont get hit unless the bottles got your name on it., Thats just what Im worried about, said the fan,my names Johnny Walker.. Jokes About Arsenal What do you call an Arsenal fan in a 3 bedroom semi? A: Santa Cazorla Primary This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days.". "Oi," she says, "the bleedin' radio in this motor doesn't work! The two examples show that football fans are capable of behaving impeccably, because usually it's one or two morons ruining it for everyone else. Q: What does a Gunners fan do when his team has won the Champions League? To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. Johnny says; 'No, but I was too embarrassed to say he played for Tottenham Hotspur.' Turn off the PlayStation. What is the difference between Tottenham and a book?A book has a title. Why did he say that when the result was announced that Tottenham lost?Because hes a Spurs supporter. "Intelligence reports indicate that the latest additions to the Ukranian arsenal are damaged and outdated, and many won't pose any threat to us at all." Q: What do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit? the other one wore no knickers and she supported Arsenal. Because the fans started to make them up themselves. A: Every fall they go into hibernation. To see all content on The Sun, please use the Site Map. Q: Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito? now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); A: Because all the cups are in Manchester. The priest climbed into the passenger seat, and they continued down the road. Arsenal have won 13 titles to Tottenham's two - the last of which was lifted in 1961. Tottenham were riled at the actions of their bitter rivals and put out a statement in response. What does THFC stand for?Tottenham Heading For the Championship. )Emery day Arsenal fans are hoping for a better season! How he fit a regulation pitch down there, we still don't know. There's nothing worth craping on! Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. Theyre still talking about the lightbulb that they originally tried to buy but didnt. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. But, as usual, he swerved back onto the road just in time. Q: What do I have in common with Arsenal? The last title won on a Spurs ground? The receptionist replies A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. Arsenal fans still sing his name with pride and affection. Heres how it works. Since he led Arsenal to another quick European exit. Q: What do you call 5 Tottenham fans standing ear to ear? 679215 Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF. Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. Arsenals 100% win record start to the EPL season 2022-23 was finally ended after six games, and fans are speculating about a similar pattern in previous seasons post-Wenger era. Some Tottenham fans took to social media to mock their North London rivals after Arsenal's loss to Aston Villa on Monday meant that they will finish below Spurs again this year. "The other man was flabbergasted and said "how in the name of god do you know that? Even though he was certain that he had missed the guy, he still heard a loud THUD. Arsenal fans love a dig at Tottenham so they'll be thrilled to know even the online store is getting in on the act. If you click the basket without any items having been added, a pop-up message on the site will show up. Arsenal might be top of the Premier League by five points, and clear of local rivals Tottenham Hotspur by 11 points, but one fan still thinks the Spurs players are better. Read ourTransfer News Live blogfor the very latest rumours, gossip and done deals, Moment Aston Villa's Leon Bailey inhales 'laughing gas' after all night party, Mason Greenwood's England future revealed after rejecting country switch, Nicky Butt quit Man Utd as he couldnt stand players beating him to team, Man Utd considering THREE options for Mason Greenwood if he stays at club, News Group Newspapers Limited in England No. Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. ", This satisfies the woman, who immediately gets back into the car and drives for home. Ramsdale had been a key figure in the victory . A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Champions League final on television. FourFourTwo is part of Future plc, an international media group and leading digital publisher. The man pauses for a moment before exclaiming, God! When is Tottenham going to win a trophy? Q: How do you keep a Gunners fan from masterbating? Why does Arsenal FC plant potatoes at the edge of the pitch?So they have something major to lift at the end of the season. What does an Arsenal fan do when he sees a blue bird flying?Shoots it and then gives it to a Spurs Fan. ARSENAL have sent social media into meltdown after brutally trolling Tottenham's 'empty trophy cabinet' on their official store website. As the goals flew in for Arsenal at Emirates Stadium in their 4-0 win against Aston Villa, in Newcastle the opposite was being inflicted on Tottenham as they somehow slumped to a 5-1 deficit against a relegated team with 10 men. The car radio automatically switches to classical music. He rushes over, introduces himself and takes out his pad and pencil to start his story for the next edition. The primary is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. Select it and click on the button to choose it.Then click on the link if you want to upload up to 3 more images. Just look at our cars, there's nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. Tottenham are simply incapable of finishing above their rivals; the football gods will not allow it. ', Megan Fox was thinking: 'That Arsenal fan must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Spurs fan and got slapped for it.'. Q: What do you call an Tottenham Hotspur fan that does well on an IQ test? "Climb in, Father. Arsenal fans still celebrate in song the glory years when they enjoyed title victory on enemy territory at Tottenham in the Double-winning year of 1971 and again under Arsene Wenger in 2004. Q: Did you hear that Tottenham Hotspur doesn't have a website? Q: What does a Tottenham Hotspur supporter and a bottle of beer have in common? Q: What do you say to a Tottenham Hotspur supporter with a good looking bird on his arm? If you use a smartphone, you can also use the drawer menu of the browser you are using. Q: Why did god invent alcohol? Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? A: So Arsenal supporters can get laid too. What are the three people you can never advise? What should you do? When he was injured,the Newspaper wrote"Arsenal to play without Dicks". A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! Why did the Spurs have been forced to rename their ground White Lane?Because their Hart was surgically removed when Berbatov and Keane were sold.
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